Fashionably Wise

Considering I love fashion,
  (and even though I would never call myself a fashionista)

I thought I would start featuring pieces that have become essentials in my life!

This first piece arrived at my apartment not that long ago.
I was head over heals the first time I gazed upon it on pinterest.
And although it was the quote that grabbed my attention,
  the handiwork of metal and leather held my interest.

I'm proud to present:

My permanent accessory from philanthropyfashion.com!

Let me tell you a little about Philanthropy Fashion.

The website has all sorts of features, including items you can buy. It includes everything from necklaces (Giving Keys) to bracelets (L&Es) to shirts and handbags. The items purchased help fund charitable donations. So now, you're looking stylish AND supporting a great cause.

The bracelet I purchased is actually a combination of three items: 2 braided leather bands and 1 L&E sentiment.

You can mix and match leather pieces and sentiments (they have A TON!) as you find items that tug on your heartstrings. My next purchase from them will be a wide leather cuff (when they stop selling out so quickly!) and the L&E sentiment "Not all who wander are lost". I'm also loving the "Giving Keys" necklaces- inscribed with one word, they are meant to be worn and then given to someone when you feel the moment is right. Great philosophy on literally- paying it forward.

Just look at all the great things they have!

So waste no time! Check out philanthropyfashion.com RIGHT NOW!

38 Days Strong

This is day Number 38.

38 Days straight of work.
     Not one single day off.

Needless to say, I am looking forward to my weekend off.
I have many things to share with you and I keep hoping soon I will be able to so more blogging.

But until then, and even amidst 38 days straight, this song rings truer than I have ever known before...

This could really be a good life.

Life is what you make it, my friends. 

Busy Worker Bee

So...
I've definitely been absent in the posting.
Sorry about that!

I actually just returned home from one job (at 11:00pm) and have to wind down in order to wake up at 5am tomorrow for another job, where I will work for 10 hours. And then head over to sell some plasma.

This is day number 17 in a row for me. And I have another 15 to go before I have a day off.
When it's all said and done. I'll have worked 45 days with a total of two days off. Yikes!

BUT then I have a weekend off in Chicago. Boy, am I gonna be thankful for that!

So pardon my absence. My life has been a blur of serving tables, changing diapers, constructing emails, and getting stuck with needles for money.

I hope to stir up a little energy within the next few days and write a decent post :)

Hope all is well with the rest of you!

Emotional Pep Talk

Considering the last two posts have consisted of my inner self,

I thought I would lighten the mood and post a little pep talk.

If your life is anything like mine,

it's not perfect.

BUT I am continuously blessed in so many ways.

I might have to work four jobs and sell my plasma to pay all my bills,

but I have friends and family who love me,

two cats that make me smile,

a running car,

a city that has many free exploration opportunities,

and a bright future.

Come this May,

I am hoping to make the BIG move to California.

I am looking to go back to undergrad for a Psych degree and then onto grad school for Clinical Psychology.

I don't have any family out there and just one friend,

BUT

Life is all about taking chances, taking risks, and pushing forward.

and despite how much I am in love with my [now] home,

I know that in order to continue to grow,

this is a step I must take.

Life is grand and Life is beautiful.

It is full of unknowns, devastations, celebrations, tears, laughter, and joy.

A quote I have always held dear to my heart:


 "He who has felt the deepest grief is best able to experience supreme happiness. We must of felt what it is to die, that we may appreciate the enjoyments of life. Live, then, and be happy, beloved children of my heart, and never forget, that until the day God will deign to reveal the future to man, all human wisdom is contained in these two words, 'Wait and Hope.” - Alexandre Dumas

Past Karma

Written Circa October 2011


You should know you're a liar.
From the tip of the tongue you kissed me with
to the end of the fingers that caressed me.
You lied.

Told me it would all be alright if I just took another shot,
poured another drink
stole just one more kiss,

But you had no intention on following through.
We both knew we could never be lovers, but you
You promised we would always be friends.

It's the only reason I kissed you.
The only reason I let you undress me with your hands,
instead of just your eyes.
The only reason I opened up to you.

You told me we were friends.
Not lovers. No never. But always friends.

Well fuck you.

Because it's been months since I've kissed you
and months since you've called.
My words are met with dial tone and dead air.

I don't want your body.
I don't want to wrap my fingers around yours.

We said never lovers. But you promised,
always friends.

And FUCK YOU.

You apologized for his mistake.
You said you would take the pain if you could.
Said you didn't understand how he could walk away after all his beautiful promises to me.

You said, with our bodies warm, tingling, and intertwined. No, never lovers but always friends.

Well you should know I think you're a liar.
You should know that I hate what you did to me.
You should know that you hurt me worse than him.

You should know, Every night,
I wish...

If only lovers, and never friends.

Open Exposure

The primary reason I started this blog was to have an outlet.
A place where I could share thoughts, ideas, conflicts, etc without having to worry about offending people.
It's why none on my friends or family know about this blog.
It's why I'm not sending friends to my site,
or writing blogs as if I am keeping far away family updated on my life.

NO ONE who knows me in person knows of this site.

It is my freedom.

Now that being said,

 I haven't done as much sharing as I would like.

 Perhaps it's because the internet can be a scary thing.

 Once it's out there, it's there for everyone or anyone to see. Permanently. 

In fact, I once blogged (via MSN spaces or what have you) circa 8th grade a poem that I wrote.

And thanks to my recent googling myself, I discovered someone, somewhere had added the poem on a writer's website. Though thankfully they gave me the credit I was owed (admirable). But it served as a reminder that you never know when things will pop up on the internet. However, it's also an excellent reminder that we should be careful what leaves our lips (and fingertips) as we are never allowed to take it back, delete it, redo it, or clear it away. We should be careful to speak uplifting words, encouraging words, and show other grace and mercy in each moment of our lives.

So here's a piece. of me. From a night/entire spring that I remember so vividly. 

Escape

Be still. just like this stagnant water.

keep that breath bottled up inside your lungs

under lock and key

because I'm afraid I'll steal it from you.

Faint stars are leading me away from you

Let me go. Don't follow me over the bridge.

It's right angle turns will keep you from chasing too fast after me.

Baby, don't trip.

The damp seeps in through my feet

the sound of my own laughter spins

my mind around.

I'll just lay here and melt into the ground.

Please don't speak my name.

You're making it hard to escape,

with your fingers curled up in my hair.

And although I don't love you, I surrender.

Control me. 

just one more time. 

         circa April 2011                       .

Exposed Brick Walls

I know I should complete a real post.
One about NYE fashion and what fun adventures I'll be having.

Unfortunately. I'll be working. Serving up Shrimp and Lobster.
Fun.Fun.
I'm hoping to rake in the cash though and start 2012 off on a better, less broke, note.


So seeing as how I just finished work tonight and have to get some chores done before bedtime and work tomorrow, I thought I would post briefly about one of my favorite obsessions =

Exposed Brick Walls

I would sacrifice a lot in an apartment (or future home) if I could just have an exposed brick wall. 

In the kitchen

In the living room

In the bedroom

Heck, even in the bathroom!

A.N.Y.W.H.E.R.E.

So join me in my obsession and fantasize about having these rooms in your life...