Be Where You Are.

My entire life has revolved around school. Seriously. I was one of those crazy kids who couldn't wait to get on the bus for school and hated missing a single day, even in kindergarten. I was an annoyingly highstrung high schooler who wouldn't let myself do anything fun until my homework was completed- perfectly (my parents really lucked out on that one!). And I finished college as a worn down, burnt out, confused graduate in Urban Planning. Just one little thing, I had always been so obsessed about school, the grades, the papers, the tests, that I had forgotten to figure out exactly what it was I wanted to do with my life. I may have graduated with a stellar GPA, but I started to realize that I didn't want the life it had set me up for. I didn't want to pursue a career in the subject I had spent 4 years studying. Somewhere in those 4 years, I had forgotten that school is meant to be a means to an end, not the other way around.
So here I sit, with a Bachelor of Science in Urban Planning (a predominately male saturated field, mind you) and not a damn idea what to do with it. Instead, I'm working 4 jobs two of which involve changing dirty diapers and one which consists of being degraded while getting my customers another round of diet cokes and cheesy biscuits. I can't help thinking where I went wrong. Except.

 I don't feel that way.
 At all.

Sure, it would be great to not have to discipline other people's children or to not be spoken to like I am a stupid servant, but honestly, I enjoy my 3 days a week where I get to sleep in until 10am instead of waking up at 6am to put on a business suit and conquer the world. I am more than content to work, and work hard, at my 4 jobs and try to save a little of cash money while I prepare to go (yup, you guessed it) back to school.

This time, I'm hoping my perfectionism won't get the best of me and I will stay focused on the fact that school is temporary, but what I am preparing for is long term. The moral of the story, for all you that are wondering where this rambling is going (lest you forget that the title is Worth and Wisdom, with a little wackiness and laughter thrown in) is that you don't have to have a set plan. That you really don't answer to anyone besides yourself in terms of your happiness. And that if you wake up every morning with a smile on your face and joy in your heart, that is really half the battle.

Take it from a crazy, driven, perfectionist. People will always tell you what you should be doing with your time, how much money you should be making, and what you should be doing to prepare for your future. But they don't hold your answers. Only you do. And perhaps if I had stopped being concerned with "fulfilling my potential" by relentlessly chasing after my academic goals, I would have taken some time to realize that I didn't even like what I was learning. So don't forget to breathe, to know that you have your whole life to "achieve your potential", and take some time to see that your potential is really the way you handle your life each and every day you wake up. If you wake up happy, willing to help and love on others, than I think you have accomplished more than any doctorate recipient. It's a lesson that cost me $33 thousand dollars in student loans to learn. But considering that many people die without ever learning that lesson, I would say it was worth every single penny.